Thursday, May 19, 2005

Special Studies

Many of us who know Jesuits became acquainted with them through Jesuit run educational institutions. I, for one, count as most influential those Jesuits who have been my teachers, mentors, and friends.

Many Jesuits go on after theology studies and ordination for "special studies" where they specialize in some area of study that interests them. One man may decide to write a dissertation on Karl Rahner, another on Whale Bone Scrimshaw, and still another on the fusion of taste horizons in each individual Pez candy. The options are unlimited.

I've toyed with the notion of being a Jesuit-chef. I'd love to go to cooking school and, provided that I don't lop off a finger cutting parsley (which I'm most apt to do) I think it'd be a wonderful profession. I think a proper meal is a wonderful expression of hospitality, a ministry that is most appealing to my sensibilities. And yet, I can't help but wonder if I might not make one hell of a bartender. Don't mis-interpret this: I wouldn't want to do it so that I could become a lush, but rather so that I could prepare wonderful tasting beverages that would, umm, help potential donors loosen the grip on their purses and wallets.

I'm not much of a drinker, really. I *LOVE* a nice pint of Guinness or a lovely glass of Dortmunder Gold (Great Lakes Brewery in Cleveland makes it and it is FANTASTIC). I also enjoy a nice bottle of red wine from time to time. But I'm not much for the mixed drink - the ones I like are often deemed "too fruity" (both literally and pejoratively. I think, however, that I'd be willing to learn how to make mixed drinks and Margaritas, if only to be of service to my fellow pilgrims on this spiritual journey.

Besides, it'd be a total revolution for the Sacrament of Confession. How many bartenders already hear the confessions of patrons? I'd be taking the sacrament to the people themselves, insinuating myself into their very own environment. I'd be of the people, for the people!

Or, as it would likely happen, I would develop my own drinking problem and end up locked in my room plotting against the Amish and conspiring to take over FoodTV.
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