Thursday, October 04, 2012

Multiplying Words

One thing I had forgotten about being in graduate studies: after many hours spent reading and writing for class, it's maddeningly difficult to sit down and write a blog post! So much of my day is spent responding to the thoughts of other thinkers that it is frequently difficult to sort out my own voice to share with others. So much of what I read, and think about, is wholly irrelevant to the daily life of the one who struggles with faith - either at the threshold of relinquishing or embracing it.

There are times when I find myself invigorated by my studies. Then again, there are times when it seems totally divorced from the needs of the Church at large. "Does anyone care," a little voice whispers in the back of my mind as I excitedly turn another page, "about the difference between univocal, equivocal, dialectical, and metataxological speech?" How does the distinction between "agapeic astonishment" and "erotic perplexity" help people?

In short, sometimes it feels like I spend my days multiplying words. I write many words, read even more, in my effort to come to know, love, and serve the one Word better. Selfishly, I love my studies because they interest. Nevertheless, I try very hard to remember that I'm studying theology not to enhance my transcript but, rather, to be formed into a good priest, one able to take seriously the questions that face the world today.

If there is a consolation in all of this, the long hours of solitude needed for studies have helped my prayer life enormously. I find myself forgoing my iPod when I go out for walks, preferring a sense of quiet to music. I notice myself arriving a bit early to Mass in order to have time to rest and pray in the quiet. After three years of nearly ceaseless activity, I feel very much stable and at peace with where I am.

I'm hoping that tomorrow will provide me with some time to write about a prayer taken from Karl Rahner. Many know that much of my theological thinking finds its roots in Rahner and that I regard him very much as the "father of my prayer" for it is through his Encounters with Silence and The Need and Blessing of Prayer that I learned to really pray. Speaking across the abyss of time, one of Rahner's prayers raises a singular question for me: Has the Twitter Generation a Prayer? 

1 comment:

Nan said...

I look forward to you sharing your writing about a prayer taken from Rahner!